I do it every year. I wait and wait for that one glorious Sunday night. Some years I’ll invite some friends over and make swanky pink cocktails, and other years I’ll opt to snuggle up in my jammies and pop some popcorn. Either way, I count down the minutes until…you guessed it…the Academy Awards (you can sub in the MTV Video Awards or the Soapies…whatever floats your boat)! I watch in wonderment as people like Brad, Angelina, Meryl and the occasional Pauly Shore walk down the red carpet, wave at their adoring fans and try not to squint when 8,000 camera flashes go off in their face. The awards show lasts ‘til damn near midnight, and I’m either exceptionally tired or still drunk the next day, but I can’t help but stay up and watch until the last award is given out. I LOVE awards shows.

Maybe it’s because I’m a serial “practice-my-acceptance-speech-in-the-mirror” person. Yes, I’ve done it numerous times, and I KNOW some of you are nodding your head in (slightly embarrassed) agreement with me. You know you’ve done it. You slick back your hair fresh from the shower, grab your toothbrush (the stand-in for your microphone. duh.), and begin smiling and bowing… “Thank you, thank you. This award really is dedicated to my (insert mother, hubby, cat…whatever).”

You may laugh, but you know what? When the Academy finally does notice all the fantastic work I’ve done (I did, after all, play Tweedle Dee in a middle-school rendition of Alice in Wonderland), I’ll have a stellar speech prepared.

The point I’m making is that practice makes perfect. Do you really think Halle Berry plans to just get up there and wing it when she’s nominated for Best Actress? No, she’s probably staring at a scribbled-on note card the entire way there in her limo.

Let’s face it. The resume is just paper. Not hard to make that look good. The initial phone interview is just a screening process. You can have all your notes in front of you and read word for word from that scribbled-on note card. But the first in-person interview…that’s a different story. I can’t tell you how many people I know that just think, “Oh, I’ve interviewed before and I got the job. I don’t need to practice.” But alas, my friend, I assure you, you do have to practice.

Practice in the mirror. Let your friend or neighbor or wife or someone hurl the usual questions at you. Think through your answers, and take the time to commit them to memory so you’re not stammering when your palms are sweaty and Mr. I’m-a-tough-guy-boss interviewer is staring you down. Take a few minutes to think of some of your biggest successes and the most creative projects you’ve worked on. An hour or two goes a long way towards making you look your best (I was going to say “be all you can be,” but thoughts of the Army motto kind of ruined that one for me).

And if you don’t heed my warnings and at LEAST spend an hour or so preparing for your interview, your friends at Talent Zoo provide a small service to our candidates that we affectionately call Interview Prep. We hold your hand and tell you everything you need to know. We tell you what your interviewer is looking for and what strengths to point out. We tell you what they don’t want to hear. We’ll even share amusing (yet, sadly true) stories of people showing up to interviews in black leather pants and calling their old boss a cranky old man. Interview Prep is the time for you to ask questions. If you don’t know the best way to respond to a certain question, ask me. It’s my job. It’s what I do.

It’s all to get you to THINK about the interview before you actually go in. I don’t do it for my health, I do it so you actually get the job you want and later we can both celebrate with dirty martinis. So take all my sweet nuggets of wisdom and PRACTICE. I know you’re a rock star, but it wouldn’t kill you to bust out the toothbrush and perform your speech in front of the mirror.

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